Mixing With The Best
by microw-ve
Summary: Hikaru can't even pronounce 'recipe' correctly and he wants to make icecream with the aid of Kaoru and nitrogen. What could possibly go wrong?


When Hikaru was a young child, before his mind grew slowly twisted and cynical, he loved to…

…cook.

Yes, that's right.

And it just so happened that he somehow found himself an ice-cream recipe and decided that day that he would make some ice-cream. Now, this recipe was one that called for liquid nitrogen, and consequently also one that had in thick black capitals across the top, 'KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN'. Of course, being a child, he took no notice of it (or rather, did and ignored it), and tottered off to tell Kaoru.

"Kaoru, Kaoru! Lookit what I got! An ice-cream reck…um…whatever, it tells us how to make ice-cream! Make it with me, please, please, please?" Hikaru bounded happily into the room, recipe in hand.

"But, it says 'no children'!" Kaoru whined.

"Humph. That's only 'cause grownups don't want us to have fun. C'mon, are you with me?"

Kaoru's lower lip jutted out momentarily, before he shook his head in disapproval.

"Nah." He turned back to his GameBoy and soon their childish banter was replaced by the robotic clicking of buttons.

Hikaru's eyes widened. 'Nah?' That GameBoy was starting to annoy him. He sniffed exaggeratedly. "Aw…okay." Even at this age, he knew how to play people. He exited the room solemnly, dragging his feet painfully slowly behind him, and throwing in a sniff or two for good measure…

"Hika?" Kaoru ventured, like poking something weird and foreign with a stick. "What do we need?"

Hikaru whipped around, the solemnity long wiped clean off his face, instead replaced by a flippant grin. "Okay, it says we need milk, powdered sugar, vanilla essence, heavy cream, and…erm…I think it says nitrogum."

"What's nitrogum, Hikaru?"

"Dunno. Let's ask Mum."

"'Kay."

So they tottered off to ask their mother about 'nitrogum'.

---

"Mum, mum!" two identical voices rang from the door of their mother's study. Yuzuha had been working at home a lot lately, designing frantically from a sudden burst of creativity which had come just in time for the upcoming winter and spring. She set down her pen, removed her spectacles and twirled around in her office chair.

"Yes, dears?" Her voice was still young and sweet.

"What's nitergum?"

"Kaoru, it says nitrogun…or something." Hikaru had his then-chubby index finger planted on the word.

"What's this you have?" Yuzuha's eyebrows rose marginally and the corners of her mouth jerked downwards.

"Nothing, just interested," Kaoru concealed hastily. 'KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN' wasn't something parents liked to see their children holding.

"How do you spell it?"

"Um…n…i-t-r…Hikaru, is that an O? 'Kay, o-g-o…no, e…n."

"Oh, nitrogen? Well, dears, it's something very, very cold, almost three times as cold as ice! It's very special. You two will be great little scientists." She smiled at their childish curiosity.

A glance was shared between them, eyebrows raised in blatant surprise and ridicule.

"Don't be silly, Mum! Nothing's colder than ice! Ice is the coldest, freezingest thing in the universe!" Hikaru replied with zeal.

"Don't be silly, Mum! Nitrogun isn't science, it's cooking! And Hikaru's right, you know," Kaoru admonished. But their mother was already lost in the world of peplum jackets and organdie. They figured this meant they had won whatever battle they were pursuing, and tottered off to create their ice-cream.

---

"Hikaru, where do we get nitrogem?"

"Dunno. Mum said it was really cold, so I guess we can use the water in the fridge. That's really cold. We can get all the other stuff from Cook." Hikaru had a finger on his chin.

"'Kay."

Hikaru anointed Kaoru the equipment manager, or, as he put it, "a-keep-man men-a-gar." He pulled out a large stainless steel mixing bowl, a long wooden spoon, and the most accurate measuring cups in the whole of Japan. Hikaru was busy measuring out different amounts of each one based on the old, yellowing recipe, and helping himself to a ladleful of sugar from time to time.

Once all the ingredients were in the bowl, Hikaru stood up on a pink plastic stool and shouted authoritatively, "Time for the nitrogun!" At his shout, Kaoru walked over proudly with a rather large jug of cold water in his rather small hands, looking as if the glass jug was about to topple off his tiny hands and smash at his feet. Hikaru stood waiting, wooden spoon in hand and ready to stir like a madman. Somewhere in the distance, 'Chariots of Fire' started to blast into the air as the icy water cascaded into the bowl of very unmixed ingredients and was feverishly mixed by Hikaru.

The result wasn't pretty, mind you. The two boys ended up with a viscous, milky liquid that looked more like a baby's vomit, although that didn't deter them from trying it out. Hikaru spat it back into the bowl in horrid disgust, and Kaoru made a face as if to say, 'Crap, it's too late; I've already swallowed', and both of them vowed to always _buy_ ice-cream, especially since they had ridiculously more than enough money to do so.

But, unbeknownst to either of them, they had just made the world's first love potion.

You know, slow release formula.

* * *

**Aww, aren't little kids just adorable. It's been so long since i posted anything, and I don't even half know what I was doing during all that time. I don't really like this story, but do leave me your thoughts!**

**Cheers,**

**Microwave**


End file.
